I think that venting on here might help. I haven't had friends in a few years myself. When I look back at times when I had a lot of friends, I didn't have as many problem either. I cared about my friends but they couldn't handle my constant drama. Not against them but they just kept hearing about it. It sucks because I have listened to old friends problems too but I think mine just went on and on for so long it was bringing other people down. You have a place to go, not like Facebook where no one has any problems and people just post to brag. I just found a good church. I even emailed them and I got emailed by a real person, not just an auto response. I was impressed. You might want to give church a try. Hugs