I am 3 months into outpatient recovery, but I feel like I'm taking one step forward and 6 steps back, and not getting into the Teriary course I applied for really hasn't helped...infact that is what has made me turn back to it, for security I suppose it's what I know, it's "safe". This is not good, I really want to recover I want to be "normal" AKA happy.... Don't mind me I just need to vent...