I have steared clear of this thread for personal reasons but I have been watching from the outside. Sometimes it's the best way to get a clear perspective.
I will keep this brief because there isn't much I really need to say. I will also keep it general rather than personal.

There is alot of openess on this thread and people have posted some of thier deepest hurts and fears. Now I see those things being used against eachother. That is not the purpose of this thread to my understanding. The purpose, whatever label you put on it was to poke a little at your dragons, inner children, etc and see if you could together find a productive way to get past some of the issues and grow.

Whatever issues anyone has or what direction in life they choose, thier healing process and time schedule is thier own. No one can tell them what or how to do it. They all have to find what is best for them and travel thier own road. The road is a little smoother if you have someone there as a support.

Of course it's good if things can be pointed out along the way because sometimes we lose sense of direction when we are so focused or sometimes we miss a good point or lesson because we are looking at something else. The thing is these things shouldn't be like a slap in the face. You don't talk to a freind or someone that you care about or respect in that manner. They deserve better than that and as people we should do better than that.

I think the concept of this thread was a good idea but I don't believe this is a good place to do it. There is too much unable to be said and no direct contact. I don't believe you can deal with the issues and pick at peoples scabs or wounds without being there to see what kind of damage it is doing. IT is also much easier to pour salt in those wounds and walk away when you don't have to see the pain it causes.

I was doubful about this endeavour from the start but I was hoping that the participation of adults that have really experienced the pain of being abandoned, crushed, dissapointed and hurt by people would have learned enough not to do the same.

I hope you can all work this out. You are all good people and you have a common goal. To be whole and productive in your lives.

Heidu

When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.- Alexander Graham Bell