What kind of self destructive things do you do to make you feel better in the short term, but blind to the long term? For me, it is being involved with people sexually, overeating, and overspending.....once I see past the short term, to the long term, I see the things I have to change to create a healthier ME

You deserve the best in this life, we all do, and it seems you were taken advantage of, as I was by friends too, I feel if you have big heart this happens


Perhaps your 'rejecting' friendly advances to hang out feels good and puts you more in control in the SHORT TERM, whereas taking folks up on the offer and risking it and agreeing to go out with them (with your guard up, at first...!) may actually benefit you in the LONG RUN......I built up many friendships SLOWLY- by agreeing to meet up back ten years ago, took time but these friendships from my mid twenties and now blossoming

You said your sister is helpful to you, can you relate and expect others to be like your sister??