Rebecca, (great name--it's my middle name)
Thank you for asking this question. I have never really tried to describe it. It helps me to verbalize.
Depression feels like an unbearably heavy weight is pressing down on my chest. Often it is a physical feeling. It feels like saddness, gloominess, desperation. I feel like I need to do something drastic in order to get it off. It can feel like anger. At one time in past, I might would binge drink or cut myself but it has been awhile since I have reacted that way. Now I may scream or yell or hit the wall or just cry silently. Sometimes I can't wake up and I just have nightmares and I'll sleep 12 hrs/a day. I might sit in front of the TV, not really paying attention. I might listen to sad songs over and over again and make myself cry...anything to relieve the weight in my chest, in my soul.
I hope that you can receive some healing and stop harming yourself more by using and other negative coping mechanisms. I hope that the fuzziness lifts itself so you can at least get a little painting or something...there is a little light, and we have to cling to that light.
((((rebecca))))