I'm a negativity monster right now - if you don't want anymore ***** 'n moan, read no further...

I don't really expect support from people online, which is why it makes it so easy to vent about the people in my non-'Net life...

I made what was for me a very big decision and I've taken active steps to go forward into that dark night... By big decision, I mean giving up on becoming a mortician & becoming a CPA instead. And I've put it out there - I don't expect the people I know to be able to read minds... but in the past two months, not one person has said to me, "Oh, don't give up, you're just in a rough patch right now. You'll see your way clear, the Universe will provide..." Not from my husband, the two people I consider my best friends, my work friends, my one remaining pen-pal... Not a single person in my 3D life has offered me any kind of encouragement or advice on how to break out of the rut & follow my rather ghoulish dream... And my husband has only offered rather lack-luster cheers - those only came when I showed him potential salaries of a CPA.

But what do I expect from sisters who didn't stop me from ruining my high-school grades & dropping out... friends who are currently whining about not receiving any support from anyone else... a husband who is still leeching off his parents & praying for a handout in the will... coworkers who can't understand why anyone would want to better themselves... or myself. I can't even encourage myself - I'm just kind of launching myself at school w/grim determination & clenched teeth, knowing I'll hate every minute of it. All 6 years of it.

It's no wonder I'm not all that interested in weight loss or healthy eating or lowering my cholesterol or getting more aggressive w/my high blood pressure - why prolong the misery any more than absolutely necessary?