Hi fuzzy, and everyone.

(By the way fuzzy, I'm not meaning to follow you around today, it's just that you have made some very interesting posts).

Names and triggers -- Aaaargh!

My all time horror name is my father's name 'Bobbie'. I felt it just typing it then - ouch.

Anyway, here is something funny. My daughter's boyfriend (who I like very much) is called - wait for it - Bobbie. I mean what are the chances of that. When she first met him I reminded my daughter of my problem, and asked if I could call him Robbie, so that I didn't have to say the trigger name.

As time has gone by I have become used to hearing this terrible name 'Bobbie' in my life again, but I have never called him that. He is very understanding and I've told him the history. So there we are all sitting around, and I'm calling him Robbie and they are all calling him Bobbie. I mean, it's got to be funny.

There is one further step that would test me to destruction. If I were to hear the words "Good old Bob." That is a sentence that cuts like a knife. My estranged brother is also called "Bob" and "Good old Bob" was part of my father's tormenting ritual, always comparing me to his favourite child before starting the sessions of humiliating me.

Maybe I'll hear "Good old Bob" one day and the power will be gone, who knows.

It's hard to imagine though. Maybe we are entitled to keep some of our triggers. The comedian Billy Connolly, who had this kind of problem with his own father, said "I can forgive, but I can never forget."

This is good thread subject, and very cathartic.

Peaceful (non triggering) thoughts, M