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I dunno. Saying you expect "nothing but the best" from yourself sounds like you are setting the bar way to high. None of us is at our best all the time, every single minute of every single day. I mean I know that kind of thinking works for the rare individual, but for most of us it's just not realistic.
Also you seem to be so busy with school and yoga and what not, it sounds like it would be difficult for you to make time for deep intimate friendships. Maybe having a few friends that "are kinda there" is all you can manage right now. The deep true intimate relationship(s) - if you are lucky enough to find them at all - may have to wait until you have more free time and when you are able to first take care of your depression to the full extent that you need to.
Try to stay in and enjoy the moment, and take things one hour or one day at a time. Your life will be less overwhelming and lonely. You can be your own best friend.
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