BNLsMOM, I'm sorry I just saw this thread, I suppose its too late to give you advice. You sound exactly like me. I want to do these things, but the anxiety and panic take over and I begin to dread doing whatever it is so badly that I cannot go through with it. The only positive is she knows you're bipolar and seems to be accepting of that. Would you feel more comfortable if she came to your house instead? Maybe you could try that if you can handle it. Personally, I am not able to visit people and I have tremendous difficulty letting people into my house. Ug. This is why I have no friends.
I'm sorry I wasn't here for you sooner!