I have felt the same in the past, but not so much anymore. It was in my twentys' when I was trying to get my carrer started and made a mess of it by to much partying. Then I would feel somewhat like you feel. I would spend the days drinking quarts of beer because they where cheep and smoke sigs and any kind of sedative type drugs when I could hustle them. This whent on till I got physically sick. After getting nurced back to health, I would realise that I wanted something better. I started by taking a hot shower, getting in my sweats, putting a cassett player on with my favorite music and riding my bike. The exercise made me feel better. Next I would find a job doing anything physical. I slowly started to come back to life. The symptums would come back, usually in the winter, and I would repeat the same cycle. I got help from a therapist when I was in rehab, and learned how to build up my self esteem. I set new goals, and I am striving to get there. Whith out the drugs and alcohol, and trying to please everybody and having to have everybody like me, everything is going good. Yes the blues come back to visit but I gently ride them out. Hope this helps. The Gooseter