Quote:
Originally Posted by CJR520
.... I went to a christian counselor a couple of years ago because of his mid-life crisis deal. The counselor told me he was too spoiled;by me. ........One of his biggest problems is that he won't call anyone else. He has some very nice friends who would love to do things with him, but he is very stubborn, and it is too bad. I can fill the slot sometimes, but not all the time. ..... Just sticks to himself too much. I can't do much to change that at his age of 63, I guess. I see some other older men around us that are like this also. Maybe it is a man thing!
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I was going to say that too-- that he's spoiled by you. We DO teach people how to treat us-- you must have allowed this behavior to go on and on for some time or else he wouldn't be acting that way.(not that it's ALL your fault) and he won't call anyone else because YOU are always there when he wants you to be.... he doesn't NEED to call anyone as long as you give into him. I think it's a myth that you can't teach an old dog new tricks-- it's been discovered that humans continue to learn until the day they die..... one is NEVER too old to learn... it's the WILL to do it that can be the obstacle.
I agree with another poster that said-- they don't think it's a "man" thing. I think it's just how someone has been allowed to be in a relationship and what was required of each other(so many women "mother" their husbands.... then they complain when the husband acts out like a child
)...... he requires you to be present in his interests and you don't require the same(doesn't that sound like a mother-child relationship?).... I would venture to bet that it's been like this for a long time in your relationship. If you're not happy with the status quo--- make some changes... little at a time...... I think you will find old dogs CAN learn new tricks!
best to you
fins