I guess if I had to choose between my parents or my husband and myself figuring out what to do with our daughter, I'd make sure my parents weren't suffering. Now that I'm nearly 60, I understand just how much harder it is when one is older.

Like Echoes says, I'd see what my daughter said and also have a chat with everyone; parents, daughter, grandparents and, hopefully, whatever therapists and everyone see what could be come up with.