Thanks everyone

It feels like something shifted inside. T does a lot of modeling for me...saying things out loud to the perp (who obviously isn't actually there) like "you can't do that anymore" and "you're a bad person". He has me say things like "go away" and "don't come back". It's like he's MODELED power, and I've PRACTICED power, but I've never felt it.

I always spend so much time wishing, wishing, wishing that I could go back and make it not happen. I knew I was kind of stuck in my healing because of that, but I couldn't not wish that. Now I feel a little more like "fine, you did that stuff to me..well **** you, you DON'T get to hurt me anymore."

Healing surprises me. It's like just when I feel as bad as I've ever felt, something shifts and all of of a sudden, I've taken another step forward. And it's such a relief.