Hey hey hey.
Total loss of confidence, physical capabilties severely reduced (every simple task becomes a disaster), like everyone hates me, seeing/hearing things (not serious, just on the peripheral, as it were), every second's an agonising, torturing struggle, headaches, heavy breathing, palpitations, loss of appetite/interest in food, not wanting to talk to or be near anyone, total loss of trust, loss of concentration/focus (which sucks at school), like nothing will ever go right, a feeling of complete loss of control, feeling like a failure, feeling like a horrible person who should be shunned, feeling like a burden to everyone, wanting every second to run away and never have to deal with anyone or talk to anyone again, and desperately desperately uncomfortable.

It changes though. Sometimes it's extreme bitterness, sometimes extreme hoplessness, sometimes extreme paranoia/insecurity/neuroticism. . . . .

Stuff like that