Hello Lex,
What you said about stress causing you to be depressed and suicidal is describing me to a T....my T and I talk about this all the time...about how I give others so much power to determine how I feel.....we need to take our power back ....easier said then done huh?
please try to lessen your stress load by telling your bf that you need some time for youself...I hope he understands...if he doesnt that is about him....wish there was more that I could say to help...do not know if this does or not...
sorry for ranting on....
take care and thinking of you