so, since I'm in DBT there is a big focus on mindfulness, which I have found to be really helpful to me in some ways (observing my emotions, for one). Lately I've been flooded with a lot of flashbacks and memories of past trauma, and my T has been talking a lot about mindfulness the last couple of weeks.

For example, when I'm having a flashback, to remind myself that it's not happening NOW and to do grounding to keep myself oriented to the present.

It sounds a lot like she's saying "if you would think about it differently, you wouldn't suffer so much when the flashbacks happen". It feels like it's my fault for suffering, because I'm doing it wrong. The negative, self-hatred type feelings just snowball from there. It makes me not call her when I should, because I feel like I shouldn't NEED to call her, if I was doing mindfulness "right" then I'd be FINE and I wouldn't NEED to call her, you know?

I know this is probably some sort of cognitive distortion on my part, some way in which I need to challenge my thinking. I believe my T is trying really hard to help me and god knows I want to do whatever I can that will make this time easier on myself, I just need some help here.