Like many others, this post really struck a chord with me. I used to get so so so hurt when T would say similar things because it felt like a denial of my experience. I recall once telling him that there was a part of me who hides from him because he scares her and she feels like he is denying her. Ugh. I personally can't buy into the cognitive distortion theory because that is too close to my childhood experience which was full of distortions and denials. So for me, I have to move in the direction of integration with (at least my) full knowledge of the hurting kid inside of me. I do this by continuing to talk with T about everything and anything that comes up. I have recently been better able to stop and notice with my observing self, the incidents in my daily life that trigger my inner child. I tell her she's okay and will be okay. She needs affirmations and lots of them. So the mindfulness part for me (and I DO use it) is for my adult self and allows my adult self to stay present and okay in the moment so I can take care of my child self (not because the child self doesn't exist or lived long ago--she is still very real inside of me). Thank you for your post. It gave me a lot of food for thought. It gave me the starting point to think some of this through. I think I have lots to say in therapy today!