I'm not sure I really follow you here anymore. You keep saying that you understand that this problem is with you but then ask the same questions you have been. I'm really confused about what you said that you know how these parties usually end? It really sounds like you are too possessive. To be blunt it sounds like you need to chill out. If this isn't something you can deal with then you shouldn't be marrying her.

You respect her and don't engage in something like what? You are seriously making it sound like she makes out with men when she hugs them. I don't feel like I can help you because it seems like this is YOUR problem not hers. How is it appropriate when everyone else in the world hugs....but not her? Seems like you are seeing things that aren't there simply because you're insecure.