{{{{{{{{{{{Lexicon}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} It is so easy to fall back onto the coping skills that we have used in the past whether they are constructive or not. It sounds like you are stressed beyond what you are able to contend with right now. Please call your t or a help line right away. You may try to hold off one minute at a time to see if you can get through this. My heart goes out to you right now. Please try and be kind to yourself. You deserve it.