Hi Beyond77, I know very little about Facebook (and don't much care to learn more), so I'll only respond to the rest of your post. Posts, actually -- I went back and looked at what you wrote earlier (before my time here) in My Type-A personality is ruining my life, In one hell of a pickle..., and Was I in the wrong here?

It sounds to me as if you're convinced that there's something wrong with you that other people are all reacting to, and that you're the only one who can't see it. To keep this discussion from getting too convoluted, I'm going to be referring to this as "The Perception" for short.

From here, it looks as if you've been mostly looking to other people to tell you what kind of person you are, what kind of person you need to be, and how to go about getting from one to the other. I'd expect that you'd get widely different answers from those who choose to answer at all; that quite a few would figure it was none of their business what kind of person you are and perhaps be mildly annoyed that you're even asking; and that some, like the co-workers you described earlier, would take it as an invitation to project their own issues onto you.

It seems to me that most of the responses you don't like that you seem to be getting from others, are actually an illusion -- meaningless answers to a nonsense question, artifacts of The Perception. People may be uncomfortable around you because they see you trying too hard to be who they want you to be and they don't want the responsibility for telling you who to be.

I'm not telling you to give up The Perception; I suspect you'd miss it if you did. I think it would work better for you to start by finding something more interesting to replace it with.

Good luck (if that's a factor here)