((((crmartin)))) sometimes guys I know do tht when they re scared and don'tknow what to do. Not understanding what is happening to a loved one is a very scary place to be. Take courage. Do you have someone you can go to, if not a therapist or psyhiatrist, then a counselor or priest/minister/rabbi/what have you? It is very hard to go this alone, hon. Please keep posting and please let us know what is happening with you. Huggs.