i can't even imagine what you are going through, but i just want you to know that your daughter loves you and she obviously knows how much she means to you. being a 21-year-old girl with a mother who loves me and a grandmother who hates her, i can slightly commiserate.

maybe if you brief her on the situation, or go to high tea or dinner with her the night before she leaves. make sure you call her everyday and send her little reminders of how much you love her and tell her how much you KNOW she deserves a break.

i just feel your pain as well. i am so sorry.