So I recently posted a thread relating to this, you can look at it if you want as it is somewhat relevant. http://forums.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=129182
Basically, it just tells how I've been through SA several times and have many other problems that make it difficult for me to have sex.

There are a few things that perhaps I could have expanded on, because they are a bit more prevalent than I let on.

Within the last six months or so, (I think because we've been decreasing a lot of my meds) my libido has come back, from basically non-existent to a almost healthy/normal level. I'm not exactly a sex fiend, but I think about it about as much as (I think) the average person does. I've never actually had a fully-satisfying sexual experience (or an orgasm), and it causes much curiosity.

I am the kind of girl who gets along better with guys than with girls, and there is one in particular that I'm rather fond of. What makes him stick out more than the others is that (for whatever reason) I trust him, which is incredibly rare for me. I somewhat doubt that he shares this fondness, or thinks of me as anything more than a friend (considering he has a girlfriend), but the fact that I can trust and/or like a man is...amazing! It makes me hopeful, that someday I can feel love for a man without fearing him.

I am currently seeing a PTSD therapist, though we've only briefly discussed the SA in my past. Would it help at all if I were to discuss it more with her? I am skeptical, because obviously there are many painful memories there, and I don't want to go back through it unless there's a good result in the end.

I'd really appreciate any thoughts, opinions, comments, whatever.