Oh, wow, solarwind, I'm so sorry you ran into such a terrible T. Please know that the problem is not with YOU, it is with that T. Ugh!

When I was looking for a T, I used the psychology today site, like rainbow. It was really helpful to read how the T's described themselves in their own words. I got really lucky, and was able to find a good T on my first try...but the chances of this being the guy I would have picked without reading his description online seem pretty slim...there are a LOT of Ts around.

I wonder if using something like that to screen T's would help?

Another nice thing about the psychology today site is that you can find the T's orientation. My T is psychodynamic and humanistic, and he has been unbelievably patient about my need to build trust (I have a history of trauma). My T is also a trauma specialist, which is important with my history.

Don't give up, solar. The right T is out there for you.