deli, can you go to the apartment and curl up in a bunch of blankets until the bed arrives? I know it won't be comfortable, but it would be a solution to the scary stuff happening at home.

I understand the guilt about the room. Someone had to get it, though! This is a stressful time. I understand why self-harming is appealing. I know it's scary to continue with this, but you CAN do it. Try to get out of your house as soon as you can; everything will feel a bit better then.

You are doing great! And congrats on getting the actual degree