I hate taking meds. I hate that I have to take meds to be happy. I usually only adjust my meds after "kicking and screaming" that I don't want to, don't need it, can get by without them. However, next week when I see my pdoc, I think I need to ask him to write me a prescription for more meds. I know what I'm going to ask for. I've been on them for brief stints before to get me out of the worst places. I'm scared that if I don't ask that I'm just going to keep sinking. But at the same time I'm scared to ask. I don't know how he will react. When I first saw him he asked if I wanted to go back on them as I wrote them down in my history of medication. I'm scared that I wont ask him next week. That I will try to pull off the "Googley is just as fine as she has ever been" routine. It isn't as hard to do for the brief fifteen minutes that I see him. Has anyone else ever gone into their pdocs office and outright asked for more meds? I'm scared he will think I'm weak.