I have been coping with a lot of overwhleming situations lately, and there has been quite a few negative triggers as well, like running into people that I have become afraid of over time, especially my father. I have been phsyically hit and strangled many times and I don't know why, but my memory of these events was triggered last month by my dad verbally abusing my sister and mother. I don't deal with them that often but I decided to take an anti-ansxiety pill to combat this terrible anxiety that overcame me. I haven't been sleeping all that well, meaning I have been waking up terribly early despite what time I go to bed and it's usually to nightmarish dreams that seem to be about memories and my tragic fall into schizophrenia. I am trying to quit smoking, with my quit date being the 25th, and they told me to cut down before I start the patches as I tried Chantix but I am getting even more worried that I will fail again and that I almost need cigarettes to keep me from being overwrought with anxiety.

I didn't have a problem with this before but it has been coming back to haunt me recently and I am not as confident about who I am any longer. I feel I have drifted from a lot of the things I used to enjoy and now it's a little paranoia but mainly anxiety and depression that have caused this.

Also I told my mother to get a divorce so I feel this horrible grudge between me and my father growing and have avoided him, hopefully for good, but still he lives there with my mom and I have been worried about the whole situation.

The nurse said I could have a form of PTSD and that she knows someone that could tell me for sure, but even if I had it, what could I do about it?

Grithnir