Quote:
Originally Posted by treehouse
Oh my gosh, Blue. You are being SO brave, truly. To read that you don't feel that made me do this:  because it seems so obvious from the outside.
About the grief...aren't there stages of grief? I wonder if anger and regret are two of them? In fact, wondering about that makes me wonder if part of my own therapy is about working through those stages. Hum.
You are amazing, blue. You ARE brave. You are doing what you have to do, even though it's hard and scary. That is big. 
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Thanks, Tree. I wonder why I cannot relate to the word brave. I guess I dont see myself that way. I prefer to run from a problem. But Im not running this time. Maybe that is a good way to re-frame. I am not taking anymore steps until I see ftt. I can see it as fearful, or just as taking a break. It seems like seeing it as taking a break and doing what I have to do in a way that respects myself and is loving toward myself enables me to move forward. I am scared about the future, I believe (at least I am hoping) I'll have the help I need to do what I need to do money-wise and our family will be OK.
About grieving. Maybe the anger and regret I feel is part of grieving the past. I never thought of it that way. It is a gentle way of looking at it, as opposed to wishing this or that never happened.