You have gone through the process many times in the past. Why did the process not work? Do you think you are capable of accomplishing what you want without professional help? You seem to be more motivated now; more determined to deal with the issues.

My thought is that professional help will benefit you. My suggestion is to copy your post and give it to your therapist. Tell the therapist why previous attempts to resolve your issues did not work. Ask the therapist if he/she thinks she/he can help you.

Good luck.