((((((((((((((dsmart)))))))))))))))))

this was NOT your fault. i do understand your feelings. i hope that someday you will be able to heal. you did not ask for this and was left to deal with it. raw deal to say the least...the very least.

i hope you can get into a therapist and attempt to place this somehow.

i wish i could give more advice. just know that you're not alone. we care.

kd