...one way of nicely putting it

Much energy was wasted when I went through the "What If Spell." What if this or that had not happened? Would my life have been wonderful, etc..
No way of knowing
It also helped me realize that I was discounting what was, and is, good and beautiful in my life.
Is my life full of grand adventure and untold riches? No.
Is it full of intensely joyful moments?Yes.
Is it also full of moments of deep sorrow? Yes.
but
that means that I am a human being, much like others who have a variety of events happening to them.
Some of them suffer in silence...have no support and don't expect any.

One thing about being mentally interesting is reaching the point of being vocal about the pain, seeking ways to ease it, and possibly finding more peace and less sadness.

Taking care of my parents while they were dying was my choice. It was easier to get through the mental/verbal abuse then and not have the rest of my life to feel guilty for not doing it.
It was the right choice for me; it may not have been for another person.

Having no contact with my sisters has been good for me.
Allowing them to live in my head rent free was stupid.
Stupid, period.
I was on the verge of being a martyr about staying in contact with them--accepting their disrespect was thinly veiled as a family duty.
My straight shooter of a T blew that veil away in short time...

In Peace