Sorry if this is long, my first post on these boards. I just need to vent get some thoughts. I just feel so lost.
Bipolar runs in DH family, DH has been taking medication for panic attacks, but lately things have gotten worse. He tells me he has racing thoughts and he does stuff and doesn't remember doing it. He was doing drugs (he has stopped, he says) but he is drinking more. Last night he didn't come home, not a first. He was also having an affair.

He has called me home from work last week telling me how sorry he is for everything and he will stop seeing the girl. He wants us to be together and be a family, he has told me so many times he is sorry and will fix everything.

I just don't know what to do. I love him and would never leave him because he has a mental illness. Do people with bipolar do things and not remember? Or is he just lying to me and using that as an excuse.

I just don't know what to do - I am so tired of crying. I don't know what to do for him. When I think things are starting to turn around something happens. How do I know what is the truth when he tells me?

Sorry if this just sound like I am rambling.

Thanks,