i'm sorry you're having such a hard time. i think the best things to do would be to maybe talk things through yourself with a therapist or counsellor, which would enable you to sort out all this stuff in your own mind, and get straight how to confront DH about it. someone who knows about bipolar would be really helpful. also, relationship counselling would probably help, but i would suspect it would be even more helpful if you were fore-armed with useful information and a clear idea of how you feel and what you want.

as the others have said, whether the things DH does are symptomatic of bipolar is somewhat less an issue - he does need to take responsibility for himself and you need to let him know how you feel, he needs to realise he's upsetting you.

i hope things pick up soon xx