Last night i was on the fone with my friend who's grandfather died. Want to know more its in greivence and loss. Well She was talking and i know she was venting but the big "S" crossed her mind. It scared me alot and i kept talking to her till she felt ok. She allready been in the hospital for attempting. Well needless to say i got all anxious and worried and la de la u know the rest. I had no urge to cut it just was like a tape recorder going overand over in my head that you wont sleep unless you cut. No urge i practically tried to ignore it but it kept repeating. I gave in. Im such a failer. There was no urge. I had no reason but to shut that stupid voice up in my head. Then after i was still worried and now even more worried cause i had it in a visable spot on my arm.9 cuts in a row. And at work i am required to wear short sleeves. Lucky no one knoticed yet. I did this to shut my self up and instead created more static in my head. Did not help. Sorry this post is so long, just needed to vent.