thanks ((((((((((everyone)))))))))))) for all your replies. I managed to get through today.. one of my friends came over and we watched some comedy movies but I started getting really emotional during the last movie because even though it was a comedy, there was a love story part to it and it kept making me feel depressed and lonely and sad that I don't have anyone who loves me like that. I mean I know my family and friends love me but it's not the same kind of love that you get from a boyfriend or husband.. I want to experience being in love.. I want a family, I want someone who will leave me a sweet note in my jacket pocket when I go to work, someone who will every now and then bring me home flowers.. and it's not like I want a dozen red roses. Hell, I'd be happy with just one small little flower that he picked up from the ground. And It's not even the material things that I want, it's the small little things.. the saying "I love you" right before you go to bed or leave for work. Something to show me that he loves me. I just want to feel important and loved and maybe I'm a hopeless romantic but I guess I just don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, and right now it really feels like I will be. I know my seasonal depression and current stressful situations are probably making me more emotional about this, as I've been really emotional lately. I just don't know how everyone I know seems to find love and I can't. I know I'm not huge on the whole bar/club scene, and it seems like that is where the majority of my friends and family have met their significant other. I'm also self conscious about the way I look, as I've gained a bit of weight from my anxiety meds, but I know not all guys are into looks.. maybe I just haven't met the right one yet or maybe I'm not looking hard enough. I do want to sign up for e-harmony because I've heard more success stories of there than from the online sites where you don't have to pay (the free one I've been using, it seems that the guys only want one thing..). I just hope I get to fall in love one day and not have to spend the rest of my nights sleeping with my dog (although he does keep my feet warm )

Sorry I guess I just needed to vent... but at the same time I do want to be positive and hope that maybe next year on Valentine's day I *won't* be alone..