A terrific rape crisis therapist once told me - you cant go around it, over it under it or bury it. The only way to have a better life after rape is straight on through it. Take one day at a time, enter therapy, therapeutic groups, support groups, journal about it and your feelings, draw or whatever way you know of that will get those feelings out in the open for you and some day suddenly you will be sitting there not thinking about what happened and feeling all those feeling but instead enjoy that you are now at a place where you are comfortable with your life and yourself again. that may take days, months weeks, or years because everyone heals as a different rate.

Good luck and take care Im not going to say I'm sorry you're going through this because for me the only I'm sorry I ever wanted was from my abusers and I don't know if you feel that way too. But I can tell you from experience that it does and will get better, though you prbably won't believe me right now.