My son is only two years old, buy hubby and I have spent a lot of time talking about how we want to raise him. It is our intention to do better than what was done to us. Acceptance of other people and of himself is one of the most important values that I want to instill in him. I want him to grow up healthy both emotionally and physically, I want him to be honest and compassionate and kind. I think that he would be able to do that whether he is gay or not.

I have a number of gay/lesbian/bi friends, and as a psychologist who analyzes everything, I can tell you that I have some friends in healthy relationships and some who are not. Much of it seems to have to do with the level of acceptance they felt when they finally came out to family and friends. I want a healthy sexual development in my child in whatever form that may take. And I am hoping for a society who does not marginalize homosexuals the way that they are now, if that is the direction that his attraction takes him.

There were many comments made about children not knowing what they want at this point in time, but I am pretty sure that most kids by 14 or 15 are aware of who they are attracted to. When I was in fifth grade, I had a total crush on a boy named Billy. I never thought to be attracted to Suzie, because I am not gay, but I did know who made my little heart flutter. If we write off a child's announcement of liking same sex partners, then we also have to accept that a 15 year old who is in love with an opposite sex partner also does not know what they want and may be gay.

My parents were engaged at 17 and 19, and married a year later. I daresay that if they did not know what they wanted, they would not still be married 37 years later. The friends I have who are in the healthiest and stable same sex relationships, came out early, and were able to explore that in their teens like their straight peers. This means that as they entered adulthood, they had already been in a few relationships, and had a better idea of what to look for.

As a parent, I would worry about my son if he announced that he was gay. Not because I do not accept it, but because I know the challenges, hatred and persecution he may face. And I will love him through it, but don't want him to experience that kind of pain.