Wow, Rapunzel - I relate so well to what you wrote. I have been fighting with taking an antidpressant for 2+ years and I am still struggling with it. I'm just about to try a new one and I go from "I cannot wait to try that Zoloft" to "why did I get that prescrption? I'm just going to put it in the back of the medicine chest and let it stay there while I try excercise (again)." I have taken St. John's for 2 years and it has helped. But it's hard to come to terms with the fact that I need more than therapy and St. John's Wort to keep me away from the very dark days - or the excessive worrying. My therapist has tried to help by comparing my taking an antidepressant to her taking "a medication" as well. She (of course) never says what for. However I think she just wants to get the idea across to me that she needs a medication - just as so many people do. Who knows, maybe it's an SSRI for all I know! Why is it so easy to accept the idea of taking medication for a heart problem, or even a seizure disorder or other "brain" issue but a chemical imbalance crosses some line. Like it is somehow curable if we would just make that one missing "lifestyle change." And - now I'm just ranting - this is not helped by my own parents. Today, again, I hear from my mother, "You never used to be this way." Imagine saying that to someone with hyperthyroidism. "You never used to have to take this methimazole drug. What's wrong with you??" Yeah. I planned that. I was planning on being depressed. Mainly because it's just so fun and convenient. (Sorry about my mini-rant.) Hope you are doing well today...