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Feb 16, 2010, 06:59 PM
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Member Since: Jan 2010
Location: In my head
Posts: 95
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I feel horrible, hate everything, don't want to do anything, don't know what to do actually. Trying to actually try in life and live it is getting harder and harder. 
I've been living in limbo and vegetating in my depression for the last couple of months and not really doing anything about.  I've stopped doing anything really important such as work, exercise, eat right, talk to friends, and I try to avoid family as much as I can.
But trying to change any of it is getting harder and harder to do. I now have a 6 month gap in my work history which is hard to explain to possible employers. I don't even know what kind of job I want to get and the economy sucks so getting a job is near impossible. I can't seem to work up the motivation to work out, eat right, or even take good care of myself. Most of my friends have given up on me because I had stopped answering their calls and ignoring their emails months and months ago. My family still doesn't really know that I have a problem and that I haven't been working and they think I'm doing fine. My family comes from a culture that doesn't believe in depression and so they don't know or seem to understand that I'm totally unhappy.
Something is gonna have to change soon because I don't really think I can continue like this much longer.  I feel like I've been digging myself into a deeper and deeper hole everyday and pretty soon everything is going to cave in around my suffocate me.
I don't know what to do...all I know is that I HATE IT!!!  I hate, hate the life I'm living and I want to change it. I just don't know how. Everything I try keeps failing. .gif "Sad Girl")
I NEED HELP!!! 
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"Trying to take it one day at a time." 
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