Outside of sex - he's usually great. Especially recently. I go to school in MA and he goes to school in NH, where I live, so whenever I come home I get to see him. He's as supportive as he can be, as a 17-year-old who doesn't really have problems, and he's very logical / consistent / fun / easy-going. He is a very good friend. I guess what I'm afraid of is losing that friendship, and also of getting into a relationship wherein I don't trust the person as much as I do him. I don't know if I should trust him as much as I do, but I can trust him more than I can trust myself.
I blank when I try to make a list of reasons I would be better off with him or without him...but I can try again.
I'd be better off with him because:
He's a great friend, one of the only ones I have at home right now - he was my best friend throughout my senior year, and has been supportive, good at listening, positive, honest, and genuinely concerned with my well-being. I love him, and I also love his family. I'm a very affectionate person, so being without him would make it hard (but not impossible) to hang out with him without continuing to be affectionate...this would be very confusing for me, and I really don't need more confusion in the affection-portrayal area. We call each other every day to check in and talk about our days, and I think I'd feel very out of place continuing to do so if we weren't together. I feel very comfortable with him, such that he knows a lot about the stuff I've gone through in the past and recently and is good at handling it - I feel like I would not really be able to ask him to continue handling that stuff, which would take away a big support system. I also do not tend to keep in great touch with exes, although they've never meant as much to me as he has. If I dated at school, I think it would start to take up a considerable amount of time whether I liked the person I'd date or not (just because that's how I've dated).
I'd be better off without him because:
It would give me a chance to meet someone new and start over sexually, with no prior "habits" to continue. I would not have to deal with a long-distance thing if I dated at my school, which would make it easier to communicate in a lot of ways. I could build another support system closer to me, which would help me solve issues much more quickly. I would also feel like I had more control over my own relationship without the distance.
I would take suggestions on both sides, though. It's hard for me to objectively look at this situation and decide what I want.