My mom's been dead a little over a year and I think of her every day. I cry a lot and wish so many times that I could be with her. She died of cancer last Aug. 11. This is really hard for me to deal with. I usually deal with death pretty well, but not this time. I know the grief process lasts awhile, but I don't think that I'll ever get over her leaving me in this harsh world...I really wish it was me who died instead of her. She deserved so much more than she had.

A lot of times I took her for granted and often used her because I thought she owed me because she never believed her husband molested me and my sister. Now I regret it all. I wish I could take it back. I think I was a bad daughter and don't deserve this life.