God what a question, how to debunk self esteem. Millions of pages of books have been written on the subject yet the phenomenon still exists. I too have horrible self esteem despite all the nice things people say to me I just dont believe them. But what I have started doing of late and is starting to help me feel better about myself is to do good things for other people without them knowing and it gives me a buzz as then I dont have to deal with all the embarrassement of them thanking me for what I have done. As to your feeling ugly about your looks what I have done recently is look after myself. I am male, so I make sure my hair is well groomed, I shave apporpriately and I look after my skin, I moisturise daily. So even if I am no George Clooney I can at least say to myself well you are as well groomed as George. Its a challenge but one that can be overcome by looking after number one, because one thing you can be sure of nobody else is going to bother.