Hi. I'm new here, so I'll give a little bit of history before I ask my question. (Nothing triggering, though, I don't think.) I was raped repeatedly when I was 13, and then from ages 16-20 I lived with a much older boyfriend who was emotionally and sexually abusive. I had tucked that part of myself away (with varying degrees of success) until last summer, when I decided to start dealing with it in therapy. In the middle of processing it all, my therapist upped and left me to go do a volunteering stint counseling HIV+ women in Africa. I've tried a couple of therapists since then, but neither of them have been helpful.

Since I started dealing with the abuse in therapy, not a day goes by where I don't have flashbacks to my ex-boyfriend. And it's getting worse. Over the last few days I've started to have nanosecond-long moments where I think my sweet, loving husband is actually my evil ex. It was triggered by me taking some painkillers that messed with my head (thank you GP for not knowing that Tramadol does that) but I stopped taking it three days ago and am still having the flashes. I don't know how to deal with it. It's freaking me out. So what do I do about it? I start Medicare on April 1, and I'm trying to line up a psychologist I can start seeing then. In the meanwhile I'm going to see if my counselor at my college's Counseling Center can give me any ideas.

Thanks for any advice you can give. I really need help.