xXWHYXx,

I know you didn't want people to say this but YES I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE COMING FROM. I really do. You seem to be really angry about school and you are VERY intuned to not wnatint to hurt yourself and your family. Are you seeing a counsellor or anything?

Its not your fault you have depression and you CAN help yourself. This is the part where I will say things and you will say "Ye right no way can I do this or Ye whatever" BUT please listen and think about it.

I always thought and still when really low think its my fault. Its not and its NOT your fault either. No one can help getting depressed and its estimated that most people in their lives will experience 1 bout of depression. It sucks when you have it and you want to give up and you wnat to end it and you want people to ask you how you are but at the same time you want people to leave you alone. WE HAVE ALL BEEN THERE AND KNOW HOW THAT IS. THATS PART OF WHO WE ALL ARE.

I am the same as you with the friends etc. I have found it extremely difficult coping this time around. My colleagues at work who I thought were my friends turned against me as I ahve been off work for 6 weeks due to my depression.

You seem to have a VERY understanding Mum. I wish mine's wa slike your's mine's thinks I should just get on with things- if only it was that easy.

Maybe you could write in a journal and get all your thoughts out your head- it's good for when you go on rants like your post and then IF you feel guilty after writing it you can write a better one after it or leave it and it can be used as part of your life experiences.

My counsellor told me last week that all my issues(depression/ocd/eating disorder) and more issues I have will all be stored and I can use them in my life and through my journey in life.

Just thought I would say my piece. I am about to head to the doctors and am HOPING to go back to work this week or next week as I think I can manage work now!!

Best wishes and thoughts are with you!!!!