Quote:
|
it is interesting when a moment in the present can somehow transport you back to the past, instantly. That the years of therapy and coping strategies, suddenly leave you in mid-flight and plonk you somewhere in the past. It takes great strength to drag yourself back to the present, and breathe deeply and use reliable mantras of radical acceptance to still your heart and control your breathing........and then the nightmares.
|
I've been told to refer to this as the "cycle" of healing(it's no straight line)..... of which I am in. Yes, it sure does take great strength to "drag yourself back to the present, and breathe deeply..." and sounds like you were VERY strong.
It never ceases to puzzle me how adults think that children's minds work the same as theirs....... a child's fears, understanding and life experience is in no way the same and thus children are affected by a trauma differently than an adult would be. ...... and also-- just because your mom "knew" she didn't mean what she was saying to you-- does not mean you knew it --- children aren't mind readers.
Wow! I think you did absolutely awesome with how you handled and coped with the situation!
and to have the awareness to NOT repeat the way you grew up--
hats off to you!
It's not always easy-- I've worked on not repeating the abuse and trauma too...... I never ever punished my kids because they were ill or when they were injured and bleeding.
I think you are on a very bright path!
thanks so much for sharing!
