(((BNLsMOM))
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over the years I have had thoughts of hurting myself. This goes way back to when I was a kid and I wanted to fall down and break my leg. When I was working I would have thoughts of throwing myself down the stairs and sometimes I would run my fingernails across my wrists to see what the movement toward cutting them would feel like.
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Can you think back to when you were a kid and ask yourself why you wanted to break your leg? What, in an ideal world, would the broken leg have gotten you? Would it have meant someone was there to take care of you? Would it have meant extra attention? Would it have meant not having to go someplace scary? Would it have been an expression of your emotional pain?
If you can look back to past events when you had these thoughts, it might give you some clue to what you are trying to find now.
Be safe, BNLsMOM. You know you can be hurt - the scrape on your arm is a reminder of how fragile we all are. But at the same time we are beautifully strong and that scrape will heal if you give it the care that it needs.
Many warm and loving thoughts for you.
