If I could I would like to refer your to NAMI (National Association on Mental Health) http://www.nami.org/ . I agree with putting the focus on helping those you can and set boundaries on how he is allowed to treat you and your loved ones. He needs to be accountable for himself or he will never get the help he really needs, which from the sounds of things is more professional in nature. Please post if you need more info or a place to talk about stuff.