Yeah sometimes I'm confused by my thoughts. Because on one hand I want to respect myself and hold myself to a degree of morality, like in order to be appreciated and loved by my friends and family I should keep a level of value toward myself and intimacy. Then the other side of me thinks the complete opposite. There's a part of me that believes the best way to show that I am an empowered woman is to be open to my sexuality and express myself as a sexual being, since it is a completely natural part of being human. So one side of me says don't be promiscuous for respect, and the other side says be a sexual free spirit for empowerment. Ughh so contradicting.

But anyway, thank you for your response. I too lost my virginity a little old, atleast in my definition. As far as interacting with the opposite sex, I find it easier to bond with guys then I do with girls, but it is hard to keep it as just friendships because most of the time the guys are interested in me. I also feel behind the curve, as you put it. When I am intimate with guys (hasn't happened in a while though), I am quite nervous because of my inexperience. However, I'm quite open and am eager to try new things, if I could only find someone.