i think perhaps you misunderstand my meaning in the word "attention." i do not mean those extraordinary bemoaning, fainting-couch types... and i do not, in any way, mean to suggest that being stuck or seeking support is done for attention seeking in the common use of the phrase. It's a little more larger-picture than that and meant in a sort of spirit of firm empathy.
there isn't any cynicism in it unless one puts it there through one's own processes
the idea i am raising is about how sweet that validation and recognition are to a hungry spirit... and if i had left out the word "attention" perhaps that would confuse less... maybe not.
A person starved or malnurished emotionally and psychologically, to whatever major or minor extent, will perpetually seek that "food" - ie validation or truthfully, attention. It isn't a flaw, it's a natural thing to do. We will continue over our lifetimes to seek those things we did not receive and that is my caution - to take control of it and break that pattern in order to be free.
i can pose another question to illustrate... have you ever wanted to have someone say something to you, to give you something emotionally, only to find that receiving it gave no relief or only temporary relief? People seeking affection (attention has many flavours that aren't the same as the immediate negative connotation) often just can't get enough.... it falls into a void. Having someone say they care doesn't fill the abyss of "no one cares," no matter how many times someone says it. The void returns.
It isn't meant to cast a shadow... it's meant to shine a light... share the possibility of just picking up one's own flashlight instead of perpetually fumbling in the darkness hoping
someone else will turn on a light switch.
If you feel you don't fit the category, that's fine as well. If you have your flashlight or are actively seeking it, then many blessings and congratulations sincerely meant.
It was/is a question... to question one's own motives in what one does or does not do in helping themselves. No more, no less.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheByzantine
My first reaction was how cynical. My second reaction was how do snippets of anecdotal evidence support the premise? To postulate it is the regular practice of many to sabotage their recovery so others will continue to cater to their need for attention is profoundly skeptical. Frankly, I am reminded of the innumerable times I have been told to get over it and move on.
That said, I am not so naive as to think the hypothesis has no merit. A question I have talked about before is at what point is someone healed or deemed to have recovered? The manifestations of the illness may no longer be present but is the person capable of assuming sole responsibility for his/her own well-being?
When I am having difficulties, I go back to this article from the Mayo Clinic Depression blog: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/dep...atment/MY00751 I try to be very objective when reviewing the questions. Can I do better? Yes. The reason I am not always in 100% compliance, however, is not because I seek attention.
In my case, I have been told I have a personality not conducive to therapy and the medications I take may have no greater efficacy than a placebo. My psychiatrist agrees that my level of functioning is my sole responsibility, as it should be.
While I find much to disagree with, I thank you, little*rhino, for your post. |
__________________
“This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.” -His Holiness, the Dalai Lama
I will not kneel, not for anyone. I am courageous, strong and full of light. Find someone else to judge, your best won't work here.