Paddy, I don't see where you owe her anything nor does she seem to appreciate what you've given her previously. Since you don't seem to like her much, nor she you, and she does try to use you at every opportunity, I also don't see where you'd especially feel like giving her money when you don't owe it to her.

What's with the mean and selfish? It never occurred to me to think you had a mean or selfish bone in your body till you started worrying about it. Right now you sound like you'd do almost anything to avoid being thought mean and selfish -- which, unfortunately, is exactly the way to create the perception that you must be mean and selfish after all.

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To illustrate how that works: Years ago I was doing some volunteer work. One of the guys on my team kiddingly called another by the m-f word. The second guy got thoroughly indignant and made a huge scene -- don't anyone dare to ever call him the m-f word again! I don't think anyone ever did, to his face, but even years later I couldn't pass him on the street without thinking more or less automatically, "Oh, there goes m-f!"
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Anyway, I think the operative word here is "boundaries".

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Hey, if I promise to be as unappreciative as she is, will you send me some money too?